Wednesday, May 30, 2012

The Bachelorette :: "Dolly Friggin' Parton"

I finally got to enjoy my viewing of The guys, between three kids, classes, clinicals and tests I don't have time to watch it as soon as it airs. 
The agony has been put to rest...I watched. I loved. I am sated.

Em's first date: Chris.

The caption for this pic is: I wanna kiss you but I'll just high-five you instead. 
Mr. B was the champion of the "I wanna kiss you but..." move. 
It was nice for the anticipation factor but really, really bad for the make-your-girlfriend-pissed factor.

Did you see how into Chris she was?
I mean, so smitten. 
She's a gonner with this guy.
Gazing all sparkly-eyed at him, touching his skin at any chance possible, and that kiss, 
{when it finally happened} 
she was completely in it.

Oh, and he's from Chicago. So, you know, he gets 1 point for that.

About the group date:

{Was it really a group date?? I thought Sean was the only one there...}
I super, super love this guy. 
He's delish.
I was so glad Emily sent Tony home.
There was no spark there.

A few notes for the boys:
Dear Ryan, Don't tell the girl she'd better not get fat. Not a good look.
Dear One F Jef, You're adorable. Like, I wanna pinch your cheeks...and change your diaper...
Grow a beard. Or something. You look like you could be Emily's child.
Dear Sean, Don't. Change. A. Thing.
Dear Doug, You are adorbs. Your story made me cry. In a good way. Like, I wanna take care of you. 
So does Emily. Golden.

Date #3: Arie.
I love me some Arie. Good work, Em.
I think I'd feel the same way if someone took me to Dollywood.
Like this: Duhhhhh...Dollywood? Really?

Her genuine surprise was such cuteness. 
I'm not in the least bit into country music {in fact, I really don't like all.}
but I think I'd be absolutely star struck if Dolly walked on stage 20 feet from me.
She's super great, that Dolly P with her bedazzled bosom.

Emily had sparkle-eyes {Mr. B's fond term of affection for love-eyes} all over this date.
Unfortunately, they were aimed mostly at Ms. Parton instead of Arie.
You know it's gotta be a special person to divert the sparkle-eyes from someone like Arie.
This dude is hand.some.

But really, I see lots of potential with Arie and Em.
He had all the right answers and, what's more, he seemed really genuine.
I kinda loved the trick she played on him at Rose Time.
And she got kissed by the Arie-Lips. I'm excited for her. 
: )

"I love it when you talk but I wish you'd let me finish."
Quiz: Who said this? 
Answer: Kalon the Kreep.
I swear my temperature went up about 10 degrees when he said that.
His days are numbered. 
On one hand.
With missing fingers.

Alessandro: An absolute casualty to the language barrier problem.
And he didn't even know it.
In fact, he's absolutely adamant that he didn't fall victim to language barrier.
Hint #1: Stop throwing around the word "compromise." It's a big word, you don't know how to use it.
Hint #2: Don't tell a girl with a kid that you can't even keep a pet alive.
Hint #3: Now, go look up the word, "hint." 

Em's sparkly, shorty-short Aztec skirt was the winner of the show.
Beautifully done, baby-girl.

Aaaaand, I just wanna let you know, Mr. B. is quite the Bachelorette watching expert at this point.
He's got some good insight.
I'm trying to convince him to blog about it...
{never gonna happen. like in 1 million years.}

Until next week, my dears.


Lacy said...

Perfectly said, and I agree with all of it! :)

Alicia Marie said...

I liked this episode. I like Emily more and more. She has some fire in her bones and I like that!
I think Ryan and Ira should write a bachelorette blog post. Possibly the funniest blog post that will never happen in 2.4 million years...but funny to think about. Seriously, how fun would an anonymous husbands bach blog post be?! You know there are more out there...

Ashley said...

Alicia - I love your idea more than you know (no...probably not, you KNOW how much I love your idea right now.)
Those guys (real, good men) writing about this show would be priceless.

Funnier than any blog in 2.4 million years, you are so right.


Kayla said...

Sorry - it has been a busy week (and I am not in school, don't have clinicals, and don't have really I have no excuse) ;-) First of all...from what I can uncover through my internet research a luxury brand consultant is a hybrid of an interior design role, PR role, and possibly a wee bit of sales (and sleazy). The following is from Luxury Branding a company I found on line ( "As luxury brand management consultants, we are experts in designing luxury experiences. We know how to make the critical difference"

This week - Kalon is gross and I so thought he was finally gone this week....hopefully next! I agree with all your comments above. Ryan is trying too hard and I don't know that he will last much longer. Sean and Chris really surprised me this week - they were not really on my radar before. I am excited for next week!

I think a Mr. B and other men blog would be quite entertaining. Maybe you could put up a pole and if the men get enough votes....maybe....just maybe they would do it.

Andrea said...

Such a good episode. I really liked this one. I love that she had her friends grill the guys instead of bringing back past cast members to do that, her friends know her best.

Ryan, I liked him now he's getting on my nerves a bit. I feel like he needs to think of this less as a "game" and just be real and genuine, if he in fact is.

Doug, starting to really like him.

Sean, he won me over tonight. Officially a fan!

Emily's wardrobe: awesome. I really love the way she carries herself and her character we've seen so far.

I hope her story has a Trista & Ryan ending!

Jamie Willow said...

totally loving this season. Dolly friggin' Parton made that date extra awesome...and Emily totally had eyes only for her...worse than kermit ;) lol although I think Ari is going to be here for a while.